Oops.

Today it happened. I am not proud of it and I have been thinking about it all day.

I snapped. I yelled at my 2 year old. I locked myself into my bedroom after telling him to get out. I sat down I cried and prayed for forgiveness.

Now, this was a very ugly side of me today, but I feel that it should be shared because I think most mom's are probably afraid to admit when it happens. It was terrible.

H knows, that a baby is coming, he has recently started preschool, and is a full blown full of energy 2 year old boy. He is caught in between baby/only child and becoming the big boy he is. It's rough. With me being 38 weeks pregnant I can't run with him outside. He has always had trouble falling asleep, fights naps,teeters on major meltdowns, plays tricks, and has a speech delay (causing him frustration). I am hormonal and stressed. This track out was supposed to restful when I feel fitful. Tonight as Adam was trying to get H in his pj's I could see the temper tantrum and tricks coming out, I could also feel my anxiety beginning to rise.

H and I made up this morning and he still loves me. THANK GOD. I know he and I were both in the wrong, me more so for loosing it over his temper. I know that we are doing all we can, but sometimes I feel it is so hard when so many people are involved with our kids. I know our family strives to be consistent with what Adam and I do at home, but I feel even to Adam I am nagging about how to direct H.

Now that Baby Dos, is coming so soon, I pray and ask for your prayers that next week we rest and relax. I know that unfortunately today is probably not the last time I snap, but that just makes me feel worse.